What do I do?
He went on stuffing
his face. I hit him. He brushed off all the
crumbs on him and turned to me and said, “You already know what you are going
to do.”
He takes my hands. And
then folds them.
After this he leaves.
Even in my fantasies I
am not brave. I cannot be happy in make-believe. I want to. I want to. Can you see how much I
crave? Every day I crave. There is a hole in my heart and no end to craving. There is hope only in
contentment. Contentment is what I want.
To be content; that is
my dream, not happiness.
I am done with it.
Content is to know that this, right now, is someone’s perfection an even if not
so – it matters not.
The Gita tells us to
realize that we are god. Think about it. If you take into account how much you
can truly and do affect the world you would not deny that you are a god. Every
particles of our being tells us that we are special and every construct in our
head with the voice of society, whatever that is, tells us we are not. Get rid
of that voice and you will not need a revolution. You are free from everything
but your mind. It clings to itself that is me that is I for safety. Hold it and
teach it to let go and see. Feel. Hear. Taste. Smell. And then sleep.
Everlasting sleep.